Roger's Magic Show

July 2, 1993

SCENE: CLIFF HOUSE patio. Roger has just appeared . . .

HOLLY: What on earth are you doing here?

ROGER [with a smile and a flourish of his hat]: Holly, I have come to provide the entertainment.

HOLLY: Michelle and I are doing just fine on our own.

ROGER: Oh, come on Holly! What’s a Fourth of July without fireworks?

HOLLY: How did you find out where we were?

ROGER: Why, I was over at Ed’s when you left the address, remember?

HOLLY: That was for Ed, not for you! [ROGER turns away.] So, where is Jenna? Is she revamping WSPR?

ROGER: Dunno.

HOLLY: Well, wherever she is, she can’t be too happy with the way you decided to spend the Fourth.

ROGER: Well, what I do with my time is no longer any concern of hers. We are no longer an item, Jenna and I, so see I don’t have to answer to anyone anymore. [ROGER turns around to look at HOLLY again.]

HOLLY [surprised, she pauses, and then . . .]: Still, that gives you no right to show up here uninvited.

ROGER: You’re absolutely right. Just, I knew how much Michelle means to you, and I thought of this perfect way to make the evening special for her, that’s all.

HOLLY [eyebrows raised]: You’re trying to make me believe your showing up here has anything to do with Michelle?

ROGER [a twinkle in his eyes]: Who else would it have to do with, Hol?

MICHELLE appears from inside the CLIFF HOUSE.

MICHELLE: Holly? [she sees ROGER.] Hi, Mr. Thorpe.

ROGER: Hi, Michelle.

HOLLY [to MICHELLE, somewhat facetiously]: Mr. Thorpe was just driving by and he decided to stop in and say “Hello.”

ROGER: Been having a good time so far?

MICHELLE [smiles at him]: Yeah, it’s a really neat place.

HOLLY smirks at this conversation. It’s not a vicious smirk; it’s more like ROGER’S appearance is some sort of inevitable three-way running joke.

ROGER: I can see that. I’ll tell you, the reason I decided to “stop by” is because I suddenly had this blind flash of recognition that you two girls might have forgotten the most essential item for this particular holiday, and the item I’m referring to is fireworks! Am I right?

MICHELLE [in a subdued tone, as HOLLY watches her]: Yeah, we didn’t bring any.

ROGER: Well, you see, all is not lost, because I have some real doozies here, bought at a roadside stand. They come with their own guarantee. [MICHELLE looks downcast.] Don’t tell me you don’t like fireworks.

MICHELLE: I . . I kinda got in trouble on Memorial Day weekend, when my friend and I set off a firecracker in the wrong place, and scared someone. [ROGER raises his eyebrows humorously.] So my Dad said I couldn’t play with them anymore.

HOLLY [puts her arms on MICHELLE’S, looks mischievously at ROGER}: Oh . . . thanks anyway!

ROGER: Yeah, well, I’ll tell you what Michelle. Standing before you is the perfect solution to all your problems, because you see, you’re not gonna be playing with these. I am. [MICHELLE smiles.] So I don’t see how your Dad could possibly get mad at you.

HOLLY: That’s very kind of you, Mr. Thorpe, but I know you’ve got to be somewhere else real soon.

ROGER: Well, I’ll tell you, I would so much prefer spending this evening with you two charmers than any old dull, boring, idiotic place that I might possibly have thought of going to, that, if it’s all right with Holly, I’m ready to start the magic show!

MICHELLE [totally won over, looking at HOLLY]: Oh, Holly, please! It’s the Fourth of July—what’s the Fourth of July without fireworks? Oh, c’mon, just a few?

HOLLY shakes her head, recognizing another Bauer woman charmed by ROGER. He smiles at HOLLY, and is rewarded with a smile from her in return.

HOLLY stands at the railing, looking out over the ravine, knowing that she’s going to lose this one. Even as she stands there, ROGER and MICHELLE are conspiring together just across the table. ROGER flashes one of his best smiles as MICHELLE signals to him that she’s going to approach HOLLY.

MICHELLE: Holly, please . . . I mean, I won't ...

HOLLY [sardonic]: Oh, I can’t stand up under this pressure! Go ahead, light up!

MICHELLE jumps up and claps her hands.

ROGER [enthusiastic]: You will not regret this Holly!

HOLLY: Famous last words. What do you need from us?

ROGER: All I need is a simple ordinary bottle, filled with rice or something like that, at least halfway full to settle the rocket.

HOLLY [to MICHELLE]: There’s one in the kitchen.

MICHELLE: Okay, I’ll get it!

As MICHELLE leaves, HOLLY looks at ROGER. He flashes her one of his smiles.

HOLLY: Ed is gonna have my head for this!

ROGER: And a fine head it is, too!

HOLLY: You are the last person he wants here with his daughter!

ROGER: Well, when he discovers what a great time she had, don’t you think he’ll be happy for her?

HOLLY: You’re certainly in a chipper mood for somebody who’s had his heart broken.

ROGER: Ah, this old heart was broken years ago, Holly. So, what’s a few chips and scratches now?

HOLLY: So, you gained your independence on the Fourth. How fitting.

ROGER raises his hand, and smiles. He looks genuinely happy.

HOLLY: ... Dare I ask what’s happened to your job at Spaulding?

ROGER: Oh, c’mon Holly, let’s not talk business tonight. [HOLLY raises her eyebrows.] Let’s just relax for once and make this a special evening for Michelle. She deserves it even if you don’t think I do.

MICHELLE returns bearing a bottle with rice.

MICHELLE: Here it is!

ROGER: Oh, this is perfect! All right, now you ladies just sit over there out of the line of fire while I “strike up the band”! [He turns the radio to a marching tune.] And get ready for some fun!

MICHELLE giggles as ROGER lights the first rocket.

ROGER: All right.

MICHELLE: Oh, wow. I’m ready, I’m ready!

Both HOLLY and MICHELLE plug up their ears and admire the rocket as it takes off.

ROGER: That’s nothing, that’s nothing. I think you need something a little stronger.

MICHELLE: Stronger!

ROGER: I think you’re a natural for this, Michelle.

HOLLY and MICHELLE giggle and admire as several more rockets go off.

ROGER: Okay, okay, I’d give that an eight. How ‘bout you guys?

MICHELLE: Definitely an eight!

HOLLY: Oh, I dunno, a six, maybe.

ROGER: A six!

HOLLY: I’m sorry; I call it like I see it!

ROGER: Aw, tough crowd! Think we’re gonna have to pull out all the stops here.

HOLLY’S eyes widen in mock-alarm as MICHELLE says, “Yes, yes!”

ROGER: I think you’re gonna be sorry you said that, Holly. I don’t think you know what a real ten is like.

HOLLY: What did I ask for? Oh, no. [Laughs, and puts an arm around MICHELLE as the fuse burns]. Oh, no!

As the rocket goes off, all three cheer. None of them have the chance to notice someone crawling up under the CLIFF HOUSE patio: DAVIS.

ROGER: All right, that was just a beginning! That wasn’t too bad, now was it?!

ROGER and HOLLY smile at each other.

Continued ...
Sweet Dreams