Unmasked At Last!

May 26, 1989

SETTING: The church.

Preparations for BLAKE and PHILLIP’S wedding are being made. Upstairs, not-paralyzed-ALAN-in-a-wheelchair and ADAM MALICK (ROGER) have a tense conversation.

First, downstairs, in the sanctuary, BLAKE and PHILLIP are alone . . .

PHILLIP: You ready?

BLAKE: Uh, huh

They exchange unintelligible nothings. Finally, we hear ...

BLAKE: That means that any minute people are gonna coming swarming in here and catch us! [Laughing—they chase each other up the aisle. PHILLIP locks the doors to the sanctuary.]

Meanwhile, on the other side of the doors . . .

HOLLY: Where is your brother?

ALAN-MICHAEL: I don’t know. Have you seen Blake?

HOLLY: No. How about Aunt Alex? Have you seen her?

ALAN-MICHAEL: No, no, not for a while. Maybe they’re all together.

FRANK: Ross, Ross, there you are. I’m glad you’re here. Listen, there are a lot of people out there, you know. You think we should seat them now, or what?

ROSS: Well, we’d better. It’s getting very crowded out there. When did the music start? [An organ plays in the background.]

ALAN-MICHAEL: Oh, just a little while ago. Why don’t we get the show on the road, okay?

He tries to open the door, but it won’t budge. FRANK and ROSS try as well, with no success.

ALAN-MICHAEL: That’s weird. How are we gonna get up there?

FRANK: Try the organ loft.

ALAN-MICHAEL: Okay, maybe one of us can jump down from there. C’mon.

Back to PHILLIP and BLAKE:

BLAKE: How are we gonna explain this?

They both laugh, and chase each other. PHILLIP picks BLAKE up and twirls her around. They kiss.

BLAKE: I love you so much.

PHILLIP: I love you, too.

BLAKE: It looks like we’re gonna spend the rest of our lives together . . . trapped in this church!

PHILLIP takes BLAKE’S hand, and they turn towards the altar, suddenly sober-minded.

PHILIP: You ready for this?

BLAKE: Always.

Upstairs, ALAN has a gun on ROGER . . .

ROGER: There is no bomb, correct?

ALAN: Just keep your hands where I can see them.

ROGER: You only wanted me here, and I certainly wanted to find you.

ALAN [Sardonically]: Well, too bad I found you first. Give me your gun.

ROGER: Gun?

ALAN: I know you have one. Hand it over. Gently. By the barrel. Put it on the floor.

ROGER pulls a gun out from under his robes and does so. ALAN twirls his wheelchair in its direction, as ROGER closes the door.

ROGER: Why don’t you stop the charade? Just walk over and pick it up.

ALAN glares at ROGER and stands up, with the gun still on ROGER, of course.

ALAN: Okay. Now it’s your turn to end the charade. Take off your mask.

In the meantime, ED, ALAN-MICHAEL, FRANK, and ROSS are still trying to figure out how to get the sanctuary doors open.

ED: Are you out of your mind? There’s a ten-foot drop from the choir loft up there, at least. There’s gotta be another way in!

ROSS: Ed’s right, but it might have to be a window.

ALAN-MICHAEL: Okay, Frank, you wanted to come along? I might need your muscle. [To ED and ROSS] No offense, guys, it’s just . . . [He shrugs, and leaves.]

ED and ROSS look at each other.

ROSS: I work out, too.

NADINE and HARLEY cross paths. HARLEY is in a bridesmaid’s dress (!), and NADINE carries ALAN’S “gift,” which is a small chest.

NADINE: Don’t you look pretty.

HARLEY [Not so sure]: Thanks.

[Maybe she didn’t like the dress. It is a bit frilly for her. ;-) ]

HOLLY: Nadine, I’m so glad you could make it.

NADINE: Really?

HOLLY: Yes, it saves me from calling a meeting. Now that Alan’s out of the company—

NADINE: You want me out of WSPR, right?

HOLLY: No, but we have to change the terms. Now if you want to keep the show, you’ve got to get good ratings. If you can do that . . .

NADINE: Oh, I can! I can! I promise; you won’t be sorry.

HOLLY: Well, I saw a spark of something in that first show. Turn it into a flame and you’ve got yourself a job.

NADINE: Well, don’t you worry; I will do it. Ah, just how long do I have to get this fire started?

HOLLY [Distracted]: Oh, we’ll see.

HOLLY walks off . . .

HARLEY: I don’t get it. Nobody has seen Alexandra since she got here. Vera! Did Aunt Alex go back to the house?

VERA: No, not that I know of. Isn’t she here?

HOLLY: Can’t seem to find her anyway. Well, I can’t find the bride and groom either. My bet is they’ve all gone off for pre-wedding talks somewhere.

VERA chuckles.

ROSS, FRANK, ED, and ROSS decide to try the choir loft.

Meanwhile, in the loft . . .

ALAN: What is it, Roger? You shy? Or you need a bigger audience?

ROGER: My face is badly scarred.

ALAN: I see. I’m sure it’s hideous. Did you ever stop to ponder the, the irony of it—that your face is now the mirror of your twisted soul?

ROGER: This man must have been very powerful to have engendered such fear in you.

ALAN: Oh, get off it, Roger! I mean, even with the scars, we would all recognize you. Your old buddy Ed Bauer—and Holly! Holly would sense -- would know -- if you were in the same room with her.

ROGER: You are a fool!

ALAN: So they say! But once I have unmasked you in front of this whole congregation, then everyone will know the truth!

ROGER: Ah, then you will be the big hero, savior of your son!

ALAN: Did you honestly think that I would let you have him?

ROGER: You’re crazy!

ALAN: Yes, crazy like a fox! Have you noticed—you’re on the wrong end of this gun once again? After all these years, you still haven’t learned who is the better man!

ROGER: Your preoccupation with this Roger is sick! I am not Roger Thorpe!

ALAN: Oh, no? Then what are you doing here?

ROGER: You know very well. You threatened to plant a bomb in this church. No man of conscience could ignore that!

ALAN: Conscience! Hah! Roger, you never had a conscience! You’re here for only one reason. Your daughter’s in trouble! Poetic justice, I’d say. All those years ago, she drew you into the flame. Now, she’s doing it to you again. Yes, you pulled yourself out of hell only to burn once more.

Suddenly, ROGER and ALAN hear voices outside the door . . . people trying the door . . . “Hello, anybody in there?”

Back downstairs . . .

HARLEY: Oh, Fletcher! Have you seen Aunt Alexandra? The ceremony’s starting soon.

FLETCHER: Yes, it is. Why is everybody out here?

HARLEY: Ugh, well, the doors got locked somehow?

FLETCHER [Mysteriously incensed]: Whaddya mean, “somehow”?

HARLEY: The minister says this happens all the time, and he has a key now, so we’re waiting.

ROSS [Returning from upstairs, interrupting]: We can’t get into the choir loft either.

ED: I still think I heard voices.

ALAN-MICHAEL: No, that was just the echo from down here.

ROSS: I guess security has gotten a little out of hand around here. Excuse me for a minute.

The minister fiddles with a key at the door . . .

ROSS: Reverend, any luck?

MINISTER: I’d been meaning to get this fixed. But don’t worry. This key always works—eventually.

ROSS: Well, keep at it. [To ED, in an undertone] I don’t think he’s gonna have any luck.

ALAN-MICHAEL: Blake and Phillip must be going crazy. [To a security guard] Don’t you guys have any keys any place?

SECURITY GUARD: Maybe my supervisor. He’s out at the checkpoint. [Heads out.]

ROSS: I just don’t get it.

HENRY arrives with a younger woman, leaving everyone chattering in their wake.

HOLLY: Is this becoming a nightmare, or what?

ED: Or what? Just a little glitch, honey. It’s all gonna work out. We’re gonna get the keys from security.

HOLLY: Blake might be wondering where we are . . . worried.

ALAN-MICHAEL: No, I don’t think she’s worried. Last time I saw her, Phillip was chasing after her.

ED: Yeah, and she went off chasing Phillip, and they’re off somewhere defying tradition.

Upstairs . . .

ROGER: Why didn’t you open the door? I thought you wanted to unmask me with an audience?

ALAN: I’m sure that Ed would have appreciated it. Didn’t you recognize his voice? Of course you did. But he’s just a minor player in this game. I want your daughter to be here; I want Phillip to see it.

ROGER: I’m not going to humor madmen. [He moves towards the door.]

ALAN: Then don’t move!

ROGER: What do you hope to accomplish by this? When you show the world my scars, you disrupt your son’s wedding.

ALAN: Not disrupt. I stop the wedding. When he sees you, then he’ll understand what a mistake he’s made—about me, and about your darling daughter. I can’t wait to see her face when she realizes that she’s picked the wrong adversary.

ROGER: So, you, too, want to play the hero.

ALAN: I love my son. When he sees what I’ve done for him, all the humiliation, all the misunderstanding, will be over.

ROGER: How pathetic, that you can think of only this way to gain his trust.

ALAN: Best of all, I will deliver you to the police. I will see you rot in jail, Roger! Maybe you’ve forgotten that you still have a prison sentence to serve. Yes, not to mention what you’ll get for all this viciousness that you’ve unleashed upon my family.

ROGER: What if you are right, Spaulding? If I am Roger Thorpe, what makes you think I will perform on cue for you?

ALAN: Because you value your miserable life more than anything else. And because if you don’t do as I say I will shoot you right here on the spot! And you know, Roger—I think I’ll enjoy it.

ALAN: Of course, shooting you now wouldn’t be as much fun as watching you unmasked during the ceremony. But I take my thrills where I can get them.

ROGER: Such as cold-blooded murder?

ALAN: Shooting you would be like killing a rabid dog. It would be a community service.

ROGER: And do you think the police would agree?

ALAN: They’d understand. You broke in here with a weapon, intent on killing my son. And in spite of the fact that I was not invited to the wedding, I sensed, I knew, that there would be trouble. So I came searching for you, and when you turned on me, I had no choice. I had to defend myself. A few holes in the scenario, but, once you’re unmasked, nobody will question me.

ROGER: You are truly deranged.

ALAN: We’ll see.

ROGER: No, I won’t see. I’m leaving.

ALAN: I have a gun on you, you idiot!!

ROGER: Yes, you are a big man with a big gun. But I know you, Spaulding. I know your type. You’re capable of violence, yes. But only secondhand. You’ll hire an accomplice, but are you really capable of getting your hands dirty? Can you pull a trigger and watch a bullet rip through a man? No, you do not have the stomach for this. Goodbye.

ALAN: You leave now, Roger, you’re gonna miss the fireworks.

ROGER: What?

ALAN: My wedding present should arrive shortly.

ROGER: What do you mean?

ALAN: There is a bomb!

HOLLY and ED find BLAKE in a dressing room, as SAMANTHA and HARLEY leave. . .

HOLLY: Honey!

BLAKE: I’m fine.

ED: All right. I’ll leave you two alone. I’ll be waiting for you in the back of the church.

BLAKE: It’s a date!

ED: I’ll send word when it’s time.

BLAKE: Okay. Bye.

ED leaves. HOLLY picks up the veil.

HOLLY: Time to get this on. Any day now they’ll get those doors open, and finally begin.

BLAKE: They’ll find a way.

HOLLY: Yeah. You wouldn’t happen to know how those doors got locked in the first place, now, would ya?

BLAKE [Naughty smile]: Uhm-uhm! Nope!

HOLLY: I thought not. You!

BLAKE giggles.

HOLLY: Remember “Betty Bride,” that costume?

BLAKE: I remember going swimming in it.

HOLLY: Oh, I remember you wearing it in the backyard, the stores, school, and your fifth . . . fifth birthday. I think the thing finally just wore off of you.

BLAKE: It didn’t wear off me! You threw it away!

HOLLY: It was in tatters!

BLAKE: It didn’t matter. They were white satin tatters with lace flowers around the collar, and I was gorgeous in it.

HOLLY [laughing with her]: Yes, you were! Oh, you were so romantic. [Ruefully] You still are.

HOLLY: What?

BLAKE: You’re gonna try to talk me out of it now? I thought we were past this.

HOLLY: We are. Come back here.

BLAKE: Just tell me you’re not gonna try to talk me out of it.

HOLLY: No. But I am gonna look after you. You need looking after. I don’t want to see history repeat itself. This time, darling, I really hope love is enough.

BLAKE: Thanks.

HOLLY: Ah, you just look gorgeous. You really do. And you really love Phillip.

BLAKE: Yeah.

HOLLY [Hugging her]: Good. Then bless you. God bless you, and bless this marriage.

Finally, the doors to the church open and the crowd settles in and takes seats. They talk over each other—idle chit-chat —and it’s hard to tell who says what, but I swear I hear FLETCHER READE saying, “They must be giving something away here.”

Upstairs . . .

ROGER: Even in my country we know the story of the little boy who cried wolf.

ALAN: Take a look.

ROGER looks out between the pipes of the organ, down onto the crowd. NADINE comes in with ALAN’S mystery box.

ALAN: In your country, do you know a beautiful tune that held a whole village spell-bound? Maybe this tune will have the same effect. You’ve heard it before. I played it for you on the telephone at the yacht.

ROGER stares out into the sanctuary at the box.

The organist begins “The Wedding March.” ROGER and ALAN look at each other. BLAKE comes down the aisle on ED’S arm.

ALAN: What is it, Roger? At a loss for words? Cat got your tongue? Well, you’d better find it, and go out on that balcony so all can see you. Otherwise, everyone in that church will die!

ROGER: You wouldn’t—you couldn’t—risk the lives of all those people!

ALAN: You think those people matter to me?

ROGER: You wouldn’t hurt Phillip. That would be insane!

ALAN: Oh, you think so? Well, then maybe I am deranged. Maybe I have finally had enough. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain by exposing you.

ROGER: But your son!

ALAN: My son thinks I’m lying to him! When he sees you; when he sees how close he came to marrying a scheming tramp who only wants to steal the company so that she can hand it over to her daddy! Once he sees that, he’ll know, he’ll know how much I love him! And I saved him.

ROGER: And if I don’t do as you say, you would kill him!

ALAN: I’d much rather kill him, than see him in your hands!

ROGER: My God! I am beginning to believe you!

ALAN: They took my company from me! You know what that means? I have nothing left. Nothing. They have my company. But of course you do know—you risked everything yourself to try and get it! Now, if I can’t save Phillip, at least I’ll have that!

ROGER: But all of those innocent people?!

ALAN: They can rot in hell! They can rot in hell before I’ll see you take my company from me! Because your daughter is a conniving slut, and my sister is a soft-hearted fool!

The organist stops.

Downstairs . . .

BLAKE and ED reach the altar. ED lifts BLAKE’S veil and kisses her cheek. He gives her hand to PHILLIP

MINISTER: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God to join this man and this woman in holy wedlock. The union of man and woman . . .

In the loft . . .

ROGER: If I do as you say, if there is a bomb . . .

ALAN: There is!

ROGER: And I do as you say, you have a way to stop it?

ALAN: Of course.

ROGER: There is a switch, a remote switch. Let me see it.

ALAN: No, there is no switch. I knew you might take it—might try to take it from me. No, the only way to stop that bomb is a signal from me to someone in the church. Checkmate, Roger!

Downstairs . . .

MINISTER: Therefore not to be entered into lightly, or unadvisedly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purpose for which it was instituted by God. I require and charge you here in the presence of God, if any of you can show just cause why they may not lawfully be married, speak now, or forever hold your peace.

In the loft . . .

ALAN: That’s your cue, Roger.

ROGER: What?

ALAN: You’d better speak now. You don’t have much time. Sixty seconds, to be precise.

MINISTER: Repeat after me. “I, Christina Blake Lindsey . . .”

BLAKE: I, Christina Blake Lindsey . . .

MINISTER: “Take you, Phillip Spaulding”

BLAKE: Take you, Phillip Spaulding. . . .

MINISTER: “To be my lawfully wedded husband . . .”

BLAKE: To be my lawfully wedded husband . . .

Upstairs . . .

ALAN: Forty-five seconds.

ROGER: You can’t kill all those people!

ALAN: Of course I can. This is my kind of set-up, remember? [ROGER looks as if he is going to yell.] No, no! The doors are locked for security. They’d never make it out. Thirty-five seconds.

Downstairs . . .

BLAKE: For better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health, til death do us part.

MINISTER: “I, Phillip Spaulding . . .”

PHILLIP: I, Phillip Spaulding . . .

MINISTER: “Take you, Christina Blake Lindsey . . .”

PHILLIP: Take you, Christina Blake Lindsey . . .

MINISTER: “To be my lawfully wedded wife . . .”

Upstairs . . .

ROGER: You’re sick!!

ALAN: Twenty-five seconds.

ROGER and ALAN struggle for the gun. It goes off, hitting PHILLIP.